Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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