suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
