just come out here and I will go home with you...
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
whose parrot is this?
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Randomize
