Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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