remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
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