one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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