Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
