Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
