i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I'm at about main and main street
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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