Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
