it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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