turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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