I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
