We won't sleep together?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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