Plan B is the new Plan A
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
