Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
NoShamevember. You game?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize