Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
