He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
