As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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