Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
