I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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