i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
