I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
