we're blogging at a bar
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
