we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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