going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
