i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
