my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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