I want to stick my p in your. b.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I look better un-naked...
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
