I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
