Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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