were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
be right there i have to get my cape
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I pour the whiskey from now on
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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