i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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