so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
As shirtless as possible
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
