the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
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