bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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