Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I have tasted many bathrooms
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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