garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You're so nebulous sometimes
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
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