When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
