About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
