I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
