Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
