I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize