Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Walk of Shame today included voting.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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