NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
