How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize