why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
