I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
