LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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