Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Dick very happy bro
My vagina is very pro this idea
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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