oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
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