What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
